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03/01/2005: "The Pied Piper of Hamactor – Part 1: Stocmun’s Curse"

Once upon a time in the foggy village of Hamactor, on the banks of the Patomybac River, the townspeople were sore distressed. “Rats are eating our economy,” they said. “What are we to do?” Mayor Jimee gave Sunday night sermons blaming Prince Saudee for the malaise, but to no avail. The cry rose up, “Is there no way to drive the rats away so that we can again be prosperous?” With a crash the door to the Hamactor Theater flew open, and out stepped Ronee, the most beloved of the Hamactors. “I know an enchanted piper, Laugher the soothsayer, who can drive the Rats away!” The townspeople, interested but cautious, asked “But how could we pay him? The rats have eaten all of our goods!” Ronee, with a twinkle in his eye, said, “That’s the beauty of Laugher’s wisdom. Without the rats, there will be an explosion of wealth, and we can pay him and still have plenty left over.” The townspeople were greatly excited that there could be some much gain with no pain. Jimee cried out “Don’t listen to him! It’s all an act!” But when Ronee, in his folksy, lovable manner, said, “There you go again!” the townspeople rose up and acclaimed Ronee the new Mayor of Hamactor. Being the great communicator that he was, Ronee soon had a message to Laugher, who lived across the river in the village of Suplai. The townspeople gathered by the Patomybac to watch as Laugher arrived with great fanfare from the Suplai side of the river. Laugher’s voice echoed across the square, “Let me work my Suplai Side magic and there will be prosperity for all! You’ll be able to pay me and still have more money than you have now!” Ronee beamed with pride at the hope he had brought to his people, but the moment was spoiled when a gruff voice was heard from behind his robes. It was the evil dwarf Stocmun, who shouted, “If you listen to Laugher you’ll be cursed! He’ll steal the love of your children!” “Silence Stocmun!” cried Ronee, and pulled a magic ray gun from his belt. Stocmun was instantly struck mute! The townspeople were so impressed that they nicknamed him “Ray Gun” and honored him by giving all of his descendants priority use of Hamactor’s dock on the Patomybac, which came to be called Ronee “Ray Gun” Heir Port. With the morning in Hamactor Laugher’s music started wafting across the town, and soon the rats were seen to be moving out. Jimee’s clan shouted “they were starting to leave anyway!” but nobody was listening. And with the rats gone, it was time to pay the piper.
Next - Part 2: TooYoo’s Axe Cuts.