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Sher's Blog Archive Hits

Top 10 Reasons Bush Won!

George's New Ride

This is What Treason Really Looks Like, Ann

White House Prayer Meetings as a Substitute for Ethical Behavior

This Ain't Your Grandma's Party!

Sher's Ratios: Sex to Scandal and Mischief to Money

Fourth Grade Economics Midterm

Appreciating God's Handiwork

My Pitch to the Club for Growth

 

N

Nader  A champion of the People. Our kind of people!

Nail To get something exactly Right, like Machiavelli said about a big Change (say, Health care) having only tepid Support among those that benefit from it (see Americans) but full-throated (see Town Hall Meeting) opposition (see Big Lie) from others (see Health Insurance Industry).

Nasty A characteristic of certain boys, as expressed by Sen Larry Craig “I'm going to speak out for the Citizens of my state, who in the majority think that Bill Clinton is probably even a nasty, bad, naughty boy.” And who could better judge!

National Challenge An event like the New Orleans Disaster that requires Bold Action (i.e., accelerated Borrowing) to deal with rising water and falling Poll numbers.

National Forests  Wilderness areas put into trust by visionary figures of past generations, great leaders like Teddy Roosevelt, for the benefit of future generations (i.e., us). Thanks, Teddy! We'll take it from here.

National Guard  A Military organization that Commander in Chief George W. Bush presently oversees. Under his watch it has served honorably in Combat around the world. A sterling example of the application of one’s youthful experience with an organization to radically change it.

National Intelligence Estimate The consensus report of the US Intelligence Agencies. It’s an important Presidential tool, particularly when Bush disagrees with it (like when it said that Iran isn’t trying to make a Nuculur Bomb). That creates the situation under which current US Presidential intelligence can best be estimated (i.e., as “low”).

National Parks Family recreation facilities that Dittohead Senator George Allen proposes to turn into firearms concealed carry areas. Then we can change the song to go “home, home on the Gun range where the deer and the antelope play.”

National Security  Freedom from worry about Disaster. It's a traditional GOP Focus, but this year Voters think it's so critical that we might have to go outside our comfort zone and address actual threats to the Nation's Security.  If we don't, the disaster we traditionally worry about and focus on - loss of Power - may actually happen!

Natural Cycle The perfect Conservative retort to any Fact used to imply that Climate Change is happening. It’s so perfect that early Dittoheads likely used it in those first days of rain that kicked off Noah’s Flood.

Navy An American Military institution known for building Character. This is achieved by cramming lots of men together in a steel Box on the Water for long Periods of time. The apparent Result of this character-building, as demonstrated by the Swift Boat Veterans and now McCain, is a propensity for Lying.

Nazi Colloquially, a person who denies a benefit based on personal pique, as in the soup nazi’s “no soup for you!” The Government version is McCain’s “no Earmarks for you!” It’s like Paying for your soup (see Taxes) but then not getting any.

NEA  A Government agency we hate except during Election years, when it can deliver some Moderate Votes. While Liberals think it stands for National Endowment for the Arts, it actually means Newfound Electoral Appreciation.

Negative  A type of Political Advertisement. Maybe someday we'll try one of the others.

Negotiation  Application of Private Enterprise (i.e., Compensation for services rendered) to Foreign Policy. For example, Condoleeza doesn’t want to negotiate with Iran because “the compensation might be too high.” She, like all Dittohead Politicians, has been spoiled by payoffs that don’t cost anything (see Borrowing).

Neo-Con The special brand of Conservative representing the "brains" behind the Iraq Invasion. The term means Never-Ending Options for Conversion of Opportunity to Naught.

Nest  An unsightly and unnatural disfigurement similar to a wart, best removed at the very earliest opportunity.

Networking Going out of your way to connect with People. While some may be surprised to hear this, we do plenty of networking (if you count the Fundraising).

Never Said  Something you say when something you said is no longer popular with Voters, for example Bush saying he “never said” Stay the Course. His supporters are accurately pointing out there have been several minutes over the last several years when Bush wasn’t saying those words (when he was sleeping, for example).

New  Political practices from prior centuries, like Torture, indefinite detention, putting Abortion Doctors in Prison, and invading Foreign Countries “just because.” In other words, old is our new new.

Newfound The joyous feeling, like childhood awakening on a bright Christmas morning, experienced when the formerly mundane becomes fraught with promise and delight, for example the newfound fondness that Republicans have gained for Deficit reduction.

New Orleans  A sneak preview of Coastal Flooding due to Global Warming. Since we’ll be stronger for it, we’re all set for having all of our port cities flooded!

News  Interesting Facts that should be reported by the Liberal media but aren’t. For example, the fascinating and surprising news that Saddam did bad things to his people when he was in Power is being ignored in favor of the boring “news” that some US soldiers have been blowing off a little Steam. Like that doesn’t happen in every War!

News Special  A feature-length attack on your Liberal opponent as presented by the Conservative Media owners of local Television stations. The Government can’t classify it as a Political Advertisement since the GOP isn’t paying to air it. Now that’s bang for the (no) buck!

Newspaper  An excellent wrapping material (see Fish).

New Year’s Day  The holiday where everyone makes resolutions to do better in the coming year. Ours are the same as last year: to take in more Money and win more Elections. That’s actually just one resolution, but it’s all we need.

New York City  The place that voted Hillary into office, where Bill works, and where millions of people buy the New York Times. Do we need to spell it out for you?

New York Times  See Liberal. Libel works too.

9/11 The event that Changed everything. Now Presidents who make Messes of everything they touch can still have a shot at Reelection.

No The new Republican Strategy for Political Victory. Literally, “Natter Obama

Noooo The even newer Republican Strategy for Political Victory. Literally, “Natter Obama and organize Outrageous obfuscation."

Nooooooooo The newest Republican Strategy for Political Victory. Literally, “Natter Obama, organize Outrageous obfuscation, and Obstruct Opportunities to obtain outstanding Outcomes."

Nobel Prize The prestigious award for breakthroughs in Medicine, Chemistry, and Peace. Note to American entrepreneurs: find a cure for Jet Lag you’re a shoo-in for all three!

Nobel Peace Prize Another name for the Liberal Olympics Gold Medal for the 100 Apology dash.

No Brainer Any Decision that pushes back when we have to finally admit that something we started is a Catastrophe.

Nominee The “poster boy” for our current Fundraising campaign.

Nonvoter  A Floridian who made a hanging chad for a Liberal.

Non-story News we can’t use.

Non-profit  A term for how charity organizations like ACORN who advocate for Poor folks are Targeted for non-existence by Money-making People like Rush (with his $400 million contract) and the billionaire who Owns Fox News.

Non-Proliferation  The long-standing policy originated by Eisenhower of sharing Nuclear technology with developing nations only if they foreswore nuclear weapons. Bush recently scrapped it, but only because what we’re getting in return – Mangoes from India – are just too irresistible (just ask Anna Nicole and Justice Thomas!).

Norquist  An act of extreme chutzpah, similar to Grover Norquist’s advocacy of new Tax Cuts in the face of accelerating Deficits and exploding Debt. Example: “Jack, pulling a Norquist, asked the stewardess for a napkin as their  plane plummeted towards the ground.”

North Korea 1. A Foreign Country with which Clinton made a misguided agreement for them to dismantle Nuclear facilities in exchange for an Energy Payoff. 2. A foreign country with which Bush made a Historic agreement for them to dismantle nuclear facilities in exchange for an energy payoff.

Not Accurate 1. The Honorable Mr. Wilson of South Carolina’s description of remarks made by President Obama, provided during the Congressman’s apology. He was apologizing for saying “You Lie,” a sentiment that can be expressed as “the things you are saying are not accurate.” 2. President Obama saying that Mr. Wilson apologized “without equivocation.” Restating You Lie as “Not Accurate” during an apology is actually pretty equivocal. In other words, Mr. Obama, You Lie!

Not Bipartisan Obama’s stubborn refusal to adequately Reach Out to Republicans, i.e. his Failure to reach their Out of Touch State.

Notch  How gunslingers/NRA lobbyists record their kills of Targets/Legislators.

Not Change Obama bringing in Experts with Competence gained from their prior Success in making Government Work. In contrast, No Change (from the Bush Administration) would be if Obama brought in Partisan Cronies from Industry to make government Regulation stop working.

Not Credible  Any report with Bad News, for example the ridiculous notion that Iraqis are in Shock and Awe over the number their Dead.

Not Indicted 1. Triumphantly exonerated (at least until the Grand Jury meets again).

Not Political  How we describe upcoming speeches commemorating solemn events like 9/11. We understand that Voters might tune out if they thought we it was just going to be the Same Old, Same Old. This gets us the largest audience possible to trumpet how Liberals want to Cut and Run.

Not Unsimilar In the spirit of DeLay’s term Inartful, this non-word, as used by Dittohead Senator Chuck Hagel to refer to Viet Nam and Iraq, means “You’re screwing up my Reelection, George!”

NRA  A term describing the Conservative attitude towards limits on personal and national WMD. Literally, "Nothing Reasonable Allowed."

Nuance  Any aspect of an issue that could have a Liberal point of view.

Nuclear Option  Changing Senate rules to close debate on nominated judges with a simple majority. While it violates long tradition and will likely lead to a Legislative meltdown, anything that shuts Liberals up clearly is an Impulse worth giving in to!

Nuculur  A word frequently used by the President when speaking about Iran, whether related to what they want to do or what we'll do if they do. (Hmm...why the red squiggles? OK, it must be nukuler. Nope. Got it! – it’s nukular. Um...Nucular? Durn. Let’s ask Bill Gates…OK, Microsoft says “nuclear.” Who the heck pronounces it like that?!)

Nullification The Theory that States can blow off Federal Laws, now gaining popularity in places like South Carolina (the folks that brought us the Civil War). While many think the issue was settled in 1865, we’re just not that big on Precedent (see Justice Alito et al).

Number 1  The Holy Trinity of conservatism: Me, Myself, and I.

Nun  A nefarious form of Electoral Terrorist whose Religious apparel seduces Election Officials into lowering their guards. Happily, our new photo id requirement stops their attempts at Voter Fraud cold.

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